30 Jul 2008

this is the date i would never forget the rest of my life....
i duno wat should i say n maybe everything is too late for me...
i know how nice ur're treated me...how good ur're giving me chances...
u do think i din really apprecaite it..bt i did...i miss the tme we had last time..
i miss everything....
i ask u for a chance to change myself once more bt u din...u ask me to giv u time n u telling me u still lke her... wow...wat a good decision that u have made... if u thinks she is happy n satisy with u..go ahead...i will bless the 2 of u =)
i will be the one smiling to u guys when i come to met u all...although there willl be the pain, bt i do will do it...Lim Qwer Qwin here is confused...i am expecting the worst better than the best..
i am nt giving chance to myself..maybe we nid time...i am nt going to be in another relationship once more...
it is really very suffer my dear people outside.. love is always selfish... i dun mind i din get him, bt i am really very tired..i still the miss the old time of him.. we planned everything but it is ruin... nvm, go with ur new gf n hav fun thr ^^
love doesn't mean that u mus own him.. i am nt the one he wants so i hav to let go my hand to let other people to love u... bt i will always be there to support u... mentally n physically..
my friends, be with me when i am suffering n tottally blank like now... i nid u all... i can't live alone..i wan and hope u all to bring me up and live with a goal with future and with meaning...
thanks u all.. final is striking jus in 2 weeks time...i will be alone...
why am i having this kind of ending?? y?? am i really tat bad?? it's jus because of my small small matters that makes everyone hates me?? i think so... i am still 20, n i wish to learn..giv me some time... i will giv my best to the one really loves me.....

am i useless??

Am i tat useless to u all ?? so?? people have bf bt they still can mix around with their friends so happily..bt me?? like an idiot... i feel so sad n depressed..wat hav i did???

Are u really care of me??u really tat busy until forget me? do u really willing to sms me?? i feel i am tat annoying...i jus can't stand the feeling that is hard to describe... go get someone u really love in ba....

-out-

Today is July of 15..... it's gonna be half a year being with him..... muaks... will luv u luv u^^

Maybe i still nid time to change my perception...not to take things so serious..bt is tat good or bad?? not being serious in relationship?studies or anything?? i mean in some things ba... i should think more positive.... i can survive... be tough n independant please....

I hardly can meet him these few days..everyone is telling me final sem students must be busy...haha...yaya..hope so it is...after finish talking with one of my buddies...feeling better now...hehe

I was being so stupid this afternoon...bt it's sad i can tell...i am angry of myself, bt nt u..k?? it's time for me to grow up and to trust....it's important to trust a person ur're going to be with n thinking of having a future with,rite???

Anyway, take it easy ba....everything will be fine.. my parents are getting better with me.. maybe i get more freedom from them compare to last time...i am very happy daddy n mummy, i promised u all i will take good care of myself.. ok?? i will not make u all disappointed...
lov daddy n mummy always n forever... u all take good care of urselves too...

I miss my home and parents..they will always support me when i need help n support... they are always the best to me...

mid of july 2008

Time passes so fast, i choose to write this blog because i wish to flash back my memories later....
it is mid of july now, n we're about to be half a year... We were so happy and sweet all the time...
I still can remember this clearly in my mind....one day, when he was lying down talking to me... i forgotten wat topic are we chatting until he came to tell me this sentence: " I scare to lose QQ"
I was so so happy at tat time... it came out frm his mouth and he was not sleeping or not dreaming at tat time.. he was conscious...

But why NOW i am thinking is tat he wants to make me happy?? I am thinking whether is it true?? haiz..girls are always like tat.... thinks a lot a lot...I hav to learn not to think so much... i want to find more friends to occupy my time...make myself nt to think so much.. where are all QQ"s perception?? to have many friends as possible to make myself not to think so much n not to care so much... why am i still care?? but why should i keep listen to wat he said?? he didn't said that i can't make much friends...bt i jus don't feel like staying alone in the house thinking so much....

Can i go out with my friends and you're not unhappy??can i??jus for the sake to waste my time talking bout others and not staying alone in the house thinking so much to make me worry... I am worrying everything bout u n me..including my studies... I got 6 subjects to handle...can GOD help me??? pls....am i over concern???

Can i grow up??? i wanna release everything out..how???please.... really speechless..moody to talk so much... i tell myself..i shouldn't be worrying so much.. if ur're really mind u will be with me..if it isn't than accept the fact ba... thinking so negative now.. EMO-ing...haizzzzzzz
stop thinking so much n i hav thousands of assignments!!!! am i tat bad?? am i tat ugly?? he is good..bt i think i am better...

Stop being the son of bitch and stop being FLOWER HEART!!! %&^$@&^%$!*@$&Y!(*$U)@$..
jus stop n be someone tat is stable and reliable..ur're capable in studies and work, but not LOVE = RELATIONSHIP!!! hate itttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttt.................
after finish talking to my mum on the phone... i realised i got so so many assignments to do!! time is not enough for me...bark up plssssssssssssssss
be a good student.. leave that stupid thing aside...conecntrate pls... future is in ur hand, and not his!! ok???u can survive without him but u can't without urself....